


i have found someone (like a nomad finds a home)

by Hanaasbananas



Series: Hanaa's Bollywood Playlist [7]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: (again), Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir Identity Reveal, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir Needs a Hug, Adrinette | Adrien Agreste/Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Inspired by Bollywood, Kinda, Marichat | Adrien Agreste as Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug Identity Reveal, enemies au, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-10
Updated: 2020-09-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:08:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26383144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hanaasbananas/pseuds/Hanaasbananas
Summary: After Stoneheart, Gabriel figured out who Chat Noir was, and forced him to work for him, rather than with Ladybug. Years later, Adrien is miserable until one night, he meets Marinette Dupain-Cheng.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Series: Hanaa's Bollywood Playlist [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1818835
Comments: 17
Kudos: 229





	i have found someone (like a nomad finds a home)

**Author's Note:**

> I can honestly say I don't know what this is. I had a shitty couple of days so I wrote a shitty fic. [insert James Acaster Bakeoff meme] bon appétit. 
> 
> Inspired by: Inspired by: [Banjaara](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0NFxcNheoLc)  
> and BOY listening to all these bloody songs from this movie reminded me how much i love it goddamn.

_Is this that place  
that my life has been searching for?  
Why does my heart tell me  
to just stop and rest here peacefully now?  
I've found new emotions,  
I don't know what the effect is,  
I've found new hope again,  
as someone has accepted me._

Of all the things Marinette expected to happen on a boring Tuesday night, having Chat Noir crash into her balcony awning, roll off the edge and then land on the floor by her feet was _absolutely_ not on the list.

Blinking rapidly, she stares down at his prone form, debating whether or not she should poke him. Before she can come to a decision, however, he shifts with a groan and she pulls back quickly, watching with wide eyes as he sits up, seeming not to notice her presence.

“Ugh, shit.” he surveys the damage around him, the plants he overturned with his abrupt landing, spilling soil all over the floor. Scratching the back of his head for a moment, he then springs into action, trying to scoop up the soil and deposit it back into the pots before setting them back against the balcony railing and nodding to himself in satisfaction. 

It’s such an endearing sight, and so _unlike_ the Chat Noir she knows, that Marinette can’t help the giggle that escapes her. Immediately, Chat’s shoulders stiffen and before she can blink, he’s up on the railing, about to vault away. 

“No, stop!” she calls out without thinking, making her way across the balcony to where he’s paused at her command. Reaching out slowly, she rests her fingertips on his bicep. They stay like that for what seems like forever; she can feel the way he’s almost vibrating with the effort to stay still, until eventually, he turns his head to look at her, his green eyes filled with an emotion she can’t place. 

“You’re not—” he clears his throat. Begins again. “You’re not...afraid of me?” 

For a second she says nothing, too surprised by the deep tenor of his voice. Of course his voice would have changed. It wouldn’t be the same as it was four years ago, the last time she’d heard him speak. But it still takes her by surprise. 

Shaking her head, Marinette steps back, gesturing for him to do the same. “No.” she says. “Should I be?” 

* * *

_“Should I be?”_

No one's ever asked him that before and Adrien doesn’t know what to say. He never had to convince people _not_ to fear him, they just decide to be scared, and he can hardly blame them. It always upset him, how easily father made him the villain in the public eye while he conducted his plans in the background. 

(People know that Hawkmoth is bad, but if they only see Chat Noir fighting, then who is it they’ll fear?)

They’ve always looked at him with fear, always giving him a wide berth, as though mere proximity to him would be enough to harm them. But not her. No, this girl looks at him only with curiosity, tilting her head and regarding him with wide blue eyes as he speaks.

“I’m not...good” he says haltingly, loathe to admit it. “Everyone knows that.” What if she _doesn’t_ know? Is that even possible now, after all these years? For some reason, he doesn’t want her to stop looking at him like that; like he’s just a normal guy, not a monster.

“Well I don’t know about _that_.” The girl brings a hand up to her chin in thought. “You don’t hurt civilians do you?”

“What? No!” Adrien yelps, and she laughs, the sound so sweet, like the tinkling of bells that he can’t help but stare, watching as she covers her mouth to muffle the sound. He wants to pull her hand away, to tell her to laugh as freely as she wants, and it takes him a moment to realise she’s moved backwards to sit down again in her chair.

“Come on then,” legs curled beneath her, she pats the seat beside her. “You look like you need someone to talk to.”

* * *

"You can come back anytime" she'd said, though she hadn't held out much hope that he would. He’d been so skittish, and hadn’t responded to her offer,, simply vaulting away into the night and she thought that was that. 

Except then he came back the next night. And the night after that,and the night after that, until Marinette began to look forward to his visits, anticipating his arrival each night. 

It’s strange, she thinks. She’d spent so long wondering what changed, why he’d switched sides after their battle with Stoneheart, but he never spoke to her, never told her why. And now that his presence is a regular occurence, she doesn’t seem to care about getting her answers.

He still doesn’t speak much, just pulls his knees up to his chest and watches her silently as she potters around on the balcony, bringing her craft supplies up on particularly warm nights to work on her commissions, providing him with a running commentary, and sometimes he even helps her with her science homework. 

Chat Noir is very good at physics, it turns out.

He’s always so careful around her, moving slowly, deliberately as though he’s afraid any sudden movements might hurt her. It’s so different to the way he fights, slashing boldly at anything that stands in his way, uncaring of the damage he causes, that sometimes it feels like they’re two different people. 

There is the Chat Noir Ladybug knows, and then there is the Chat Noir Marinette knows, but which one is the _real_ Chat?

* * *

Adrien runs away every day for two weeks before father decides it’s too much of a hassle to send the Gorilla and Nathalie after him every time and lets him attend school. 

“You will maintain your extracurriculars, and will _not_ allow your grades to drop below a 95% average, are we clear?” 

“Yes father.” Adrien drones, standing at the bottom of the stairs. Father has imposed so many rules on him they make his head spin but he doesn’t care. He’s going to school! That’s worth _any_ amount of rules. 

“Oh and this goes without saying, but you are not to shirk your duties as Chat Noir. Nathalie will inform you when I release an akuma and I expect you to be on the scene to fight Ladybug immediately.”

Adrien bites back a sigh. “Yes, father. May I go now?” 

For a moment, father says nothing, and Adrien almost thinks he might smile, might come forward to pat him on the shoulder, show _any_ sign of affection, but instead father nods once, decisively before turning away. “Yes that’s all.”

His disappointment doesn’t last long, replaced with excitement for the day ahead. He wonders if he’ll be in Marinette’s class, if she’ll want to be friends with him, if she’ll even _like_ him without the mask.

There’s only one way to find out. 

* * *

The new boy—Adrien, Marinette remembers her teacher telling her—looks completely frazzled, sandwiched between Chloé and Lila as they both try to lay claim to him. He’s kind of cute, she supposes, in a pretty boy kind of way, but right now he looks like he wants the ground to open up beneath him and swallow him whole. Chloé will have her head for this, but with a sigh, she squares her shoulders and marches into the lion's den. 

“Hi! You must be Adrien!” she uses her perkiest voice, shoving the girls aside and presenting her hand for him to shake. Ignoring the other girl’s glares, she continues, unperturbed. “I’m Marinette, class president. Our teacher asked me to show you around. Do you wanna start?”

She almost snorts out loud at how quickly he grabs her hand, looking at her like she’s some kind of saviour, but instead she muffles a snicker before leading him to the locker rooms. “So, how come you transferred in the middle of the year anyway?”

“Hm? Oh I was homeschooled, so I’ve never actually been to school before.”

“Wow! Well, most everyone in our class is really nice, apart from Chloe and Lila but I think you’ve already figured that out.” pointing over her shoulder at the girls in question, Marinette smiles reassuringly at him “we’re not all like that, I promise.”

“Oh, good” he falls into step beside her, laughing.“I was starting to worry that I’d made a mistake.”

* * *

He’d made a terrible mistake.

Plagg didn’t complain tonight, about his excursion. That’s what Adrien fixates on as he runs. Runs across the rooftops, the only sound in his ears is that of his heavy breathing as his breath puffs out in white clouds in front of him.

Adrien runs. Faster and faster, past his own face on billboard after billboard after billboard, grinning blandly across the city at him. Taunting him. _That_ boy is perfect. That boy has no problems, lives in a perfect fairy tale world where his father loves him and his mother is still there and he’s not—

Shoving away that train of thought, he instead focuses on Plagg again. The kwami had turned it into a game, complaining endlessly about Adrien’s nighttime runs, taking his time to chew each bite of his Camembert as Adrien paced back and forth in his room in growing agitation. 

But tonight...tonight he hadn’t said a word. And Adrien hates it. Hates that his kwami pities him so. 

There’s nothing to pity. There never has been. He’s just...just... _useless, worthless waste of space, can’t you do anything without being told, Adrien?_ His mind supplies the words, throwing father’s rant back into the forefront of his mind. 

So much for not thinking about it. Breathing raggedly, Adrien squeezes his eyes shut and shakes his head violently to dispel the memory.

Below him, someone down on the street screams, the sound piercing through the night and he swears, using his baton to vault across the street, where there are no street lamps, and the roofs are bathed in shadow.

This is his place, after all. 

He’d forgotten what it was like, to be seen as the monster he is, too caught up in the excitement of school, of having friends who like him for who _he_ is instead of who his father is. 

But they hate Chat Noir. He’s reminded of that fact after every battle, whenever he goes back after an akuma attack, whenever he hangs out with his friends. But today...today was something else entirely.

Of course father never could enjoy seeing his son happy. Of course, father had to send one of his worst akumas to the school. Of course he’d force Adrien to fight Ladybug in the battle, to make sure his new friends see the villain Chat Noir up close and personal, knowing he’d have to hear them say terrible things about him afterwards and just listen in silence.

Marinette tried to change the subject, but her best friend is the _ladyblogger_ and it was all she could talk about, speculating about his motivations, talking about how terrible he is; fighting Ladybug the way he does until Adrien wanted to scream at her that he _knows!_ That he doesn’t _want_ to do it, that he has no _choice_. But he can’t.

So instead, he runs. 

Spotting the light on Marinette’s balcony, Adrien hesitates for only a second before leaping across the rooftops to land on the chimney wall behind her balcony. She doesn’t notice him immediately, absorbed as she is with her latest sewing project, but after a few minutes she gets up to stretch, turning around and freezing when she sees him.

He half expects her face to contort into a scowl, for her to glare at him and spit venom at him, tell him to get lost, that she can’t be friends with such a terrible monster after what happened today, but she doesn’t. Instead, she regards him steadily, her blue eyes large in her pale face as she waits for him to speak.

Unsticking his tongue from the roof of his mouth, Adrien speaks for the first time in hours, his voice small. “I don’t want to be a bad guy anymore.”

* * *

“New boy has a crush on you…” Alya sing songs in Marinette’s ear. 

“His _name_ is Adrien,” Marinette rolls her eyes. “And no, he doesn’t.” Alya has been hell bent on setting the two of them up, claiming for weeks now that Adrien has a thing for her, and honestly it’s getting kind of old. 

Sneaking a peek across the room at where he’s chatting with Nino, Marinette catches his eye and smiles, ignoring the way her cheeks flush when he grins back at her. His smile is infectious, lighting up his whole face—usually so serious, that it takes her breath away whenever he does smile.

But that doesn’t mean anything. 

Besides, she’s pretty sure she’s falling for another blonde haired, green eyed boy. One who visits her balcony almost every night. She can’t tell Alya that though. 

Ever since his admission to her, Chat has begun to open up to her more, as though the dam that blocked his words had finally broken, allowing them to pour out all at once, and it had never been as difficult as it was that night to not reveal her identity to him.

She’d wanted to, so desperately, when he was lying with his head in her lap only last night, pressing his face into her stomach and wetting her shirt with his tears as he told her about how much he _didn’t_ want to fight Ladybug, how Hawkmoth was forcing him to do it, how he just wished he could tell Ladybug the truth. Marinette hadn’t said anything, even as her heartbeat quickened in her chest. Instead she just continued to stroke his hair, gently scratching at his scalp until he fell asleep, his face finally relaxing in slumber. 

“Look out!” Marinette is broken out of her thoughts by the shout and she spins around just in time to see the akuma, tearing through the classroom, ignoring the students screaming and running for the exit in its quest for destruction. 

“Oh for f—” Marinette mutters under her breath. Could Hawkmoth not go _one_ day without another damn akuma? Surveying the wrecked classroom, she’s glad to see that the room is now empty of civilians, though she still has to get out to transform. Inching slowly against the wall, she keeps her eyes on the open door.

_Four steps...three...two...BANG!_

The door slams shut, narrowly missing her foot and she gulps, staring up at the akuma standing over her. “Going somewhere?” he smiles maliciously. “I don’t think so.” 

Squeezing her eyes shut, Marinette waits for the blow to hit, but nothing happens. Opening her eyes slowly, she realises someone— _Adrien!_ She blinks in surprise— is standing protectively in front of her, and...the akuma seems to have frozen with its arm in midair. As she watches, a purple butterfly flashes over the akuma’s face and he growls.

“Move aside, _boy._ ” 

“ _No.”_ Adrien enunciates the word clearly, and when the akuma doesn’t move, he speaks again, his words making the blood freeze in her veins. “ _Claws out.”_

* * *

Later, Adrien stands in front of father, and says the words he’s longed to for so long. “I quit.”

_That_ makes him look up from his stupid tablet. Father’s eyebrows are raised in polite surprise. “Is that so?” his lips quirk briefly in a smirk and Adrien clenches his fist behind his back, forcing himself to stay calm.

“I never wanted this father,” he says. “You know that. And I won’t do it. Not anymore.”

Father actually laughs this time, a sharp bark of laughter that sends a shiver down his spine. “Oh? And what will you do? You think you can just become a _hero?_ ” he spits the word. “You think that you can just join that pathetic Ladybug and that she’ll _accept_ you?” he turns away from him, the dismissal clear.

“Don’t bother crawling back to me when you fail.” He sounds so sure of himself, so sure that Adrien won’t succeed, that he’d even _want_ to return. As he’s leaving, Adrien pauses at the door, fingers wrapped around the handle.

“You won’t have to worry about that father.”

* * *

The first place he goes to is Marinette’s. He feels lighter than he has in years, perched on her balcony rail like he had all those months ago. 

Except everything has changed now. 

Marinette throws herself at him as soon as she sees him, practically pulling him onto the roof with her and he laughs, wrapping his arms around her and holding her tightly to him. They stay there, locked in an embrace for what seems like eternity. Eventually, she pulls away from him, her expression serious. 

Before she can say anything though, a tiny red—a kwami, that’s a kwami, he thinks distantly; that’s a red kwami hovering just behind Marinette’s shoulder, which must mean...Adrien looks between Marinette and the kwami, feeling light headed as things begin to add up in his mind.

Marinette is Ladybug. _Marinette_ is _Ladybug_. Gasping, his legs buckle underneath him and Marinette catches him, holding onto him as his head continues to swivel back and forth between the girl and her kwami, unable to formulate words. 

He doesn’t even notice the tears sliding down his cheeks until she wipes them away, cupping his face in her hands. “I’m sorry, I’m _so sorry”_ he gasps out, grasping her wrists to keep them in place as he trembles, crying in her arms. “I-i-”

“It’s okay, that doesn’t matter now” she soothes him, pulling back to comb the hair back from his face, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “It’s alright.”

And looking up at her face, at the easy acceptance in her expression, the smile playing about her lips, and complete lack of hatred in her gaze...Adrien finally believes it. 

_Like the poets poem,  
that gives the soul moments of peace,  
I have found someone,  
like a nomad finds a home _

**Author's Note:**

> I can't tell if i'm really tired or if this really isn't up to my usual standard
> 
> Follow me on:  
> [tumblr](https://hanaasbananas.tumblr.com/)  
> [instagram](https://www.instagram.com/hanaasbananaswrites/)


End file.
